Mchumba wangu hatakiwi kwetu nifanyaje?

Habari zenu Wanajamvi,

Natumaini wote ni wazima wa afya njema,  Nia na madhumuni ya kuandika waraka huu ni kuomba ushauri kwani naamini penye wengi pana mengi......... Nina  mpenzi wa miaka minne  toka tuanze mahusiano yetu na kama ilivyo kawaida mkiwa kwenye mahusiano lazima muwe na mipango mingi ya maisha yenu ya kifamilia hapo baadae  hasa ndoa pamoja......

Kwa kuwa nampenda mpenzi wangu nikaona si vibaya kama nikienda nae nyumbani waanze kumzoea na yeye kuwafahamu ndugu zangu wengine.....

Sasa baada ya kumpeleka nyumbani siku  nikawekewa kikao cha familia na kuambiwa kuwa mtu nilienae hanifai, ana background mbaya na hawapo tayari kuona mimi nikimuoa huyo binti.....

Nilijitetea sana kumsafisha mpenzi wangu aonekane si mtu mbaya kama wanavyosema ila juhudi zangu ziligonga mwamba kabisa, na kuniambia hawamtani na nisiende nae tena nyumbani siku nyingine!!!1

Naomben ushauri, Mpenzi wangu bado napmpenda.......je nimwambie mpenzi wangu hali halisi ilivyo? Maana toka siku hiyo akiniambia habari za yeye walivyompokea nyumbani nafsi yangu inakuwa inanisuta

Uncle J Dar

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10 Big Problems in a Relationship and How to Fix it

Relationships are one of the first things that all of us take for granted. We don’t want to take it for granted.

But yet, we forget how much something really matters to us when we don’t stand to lose it.

And it usually takes losing something to realize its importance and value.

Problems in a relationship

Depending on the kind of relationship you share with your partner, the problems in a relationship too could be just as unique.

But almost always, all problems in a relationship find their place in ten big areas.

At some point or the other, these problems have a way of creeping into your romance.

Keep an eye on these issues, and understand how to overcome it, and you’ll see how easy it can be to eliminate all the frustrations you experience in a relationship.

10 big problems that need your attention

Remember this, you can’t stop problems from cropping up in a relationship no matter how perfect the relationship is. What you can do instead, is eliminate the frustration as soon as you notice them.

#1 Lack of communication. At the start of the relationship, conversations are exciting and fun. Both of you spend a lot of time getting to know each other. But as time goes by, lovers forget to ask the same questions again.

We’re all changing all the time, in our preferences and the way we look at life. Don’t assume you know everything about each other or your romance will start to stagnate, or one of you will start to confide in some other person who seems more understanding. 

#2 Trust. Do you really trust your partner? There are two kinds of trust in a relationship. Firstly, do you trust your partner enough to feel comfortable with them going out for dinner with someone else? If you don’t, perhaps, you’re insecure or your relationship is still too fragile.

And secondly, do you trust your partner’s decisions? Do you think your partner is capable of making important decisions for the both of you? If you can’t trust your partner with life altering decisions, it’s obvious that you don’t respect your partner or their opinions. And that’s never a good sign in a long term relationship.

#3 Jealousy and insecurity. Insecure couples are forever locked in a cycle of jealously and anger. When you feel jealous about the attention your lover’s getting or their recent promotion, you’re not helping them become a better individual. It’s like a parent who’s angry with their child because the child is having “too much fun”.

You need to learn to have faith in each other and in the relationship. Instead of letting negativity build inside the relationship, learn to enjoy each other’s successes. After all, your partner is your better half, and any accomplishments of theirs are your accomplishments too, isn’t it?

#4 Incompatibility in love. Love at first sight and infatuation can last several months. And it does a good job of masking any differences in a relationship. As perfect as two people may be, sometimes, they may just not be perfect for each other.

If you find yourself dating someone with whom you have nothing in common, you need to decide on the next step. Try to find common interests that both of you like, or walk your own paths instead of living in frustrations. 

#5 Loss of sex drive. This isn’t rocket science. Over time, both of you are bound to lose the sexual urge of the first few months or years of a relationship. While both of you may have a hard time keeping your hands off each other to begin with, now sex may start to feel like a chore.

This is a very common problem in relationships, and yet, it’s one of the easy ones to solve. Always look for new ways to recreate the sexual high of the first few times, and before you know it, both of you may go at it all over again like frisky bunnies. 

#6 Ka ching! Anyone in a relationship for long enough will know just how important money or the lack of it really is. If your friends earn a lot more than you or your partner, it’ll end up frustrating both of you. And on the other hand, if both of you earn a lot more than your friends, there’ll be a lot of love and happiness in your lives.

It’s a stupid fact of life. But our own happiness is extremely dependent on the way others perceive us. If you’re having difficulties in your relationship because of money, perhaps it’s time to change your friends and see the difference. 

#7 Change in priorities. You may be in a relationship, but that doesn’t change who you are. And that’s where the problem starts. As individuals, we evolve and change all the time. You’re not the person you were last year, and you won’t be the person you are now next year.

And just like you, your partner too is changing constantly. And every now and then, you and your partner may experience changes that will pull both of you apart from each other. And soon enough, both of you may have nothing in common. Spend enough time with each other and try to evolve together in a similar direction. Talk about your beliefs and your interests with each other and it’ll help both of you grow together along the same path. 

#8 Time. Do both of you have enough time to spend with each other? These days, time is a luxury that most lovers can’t afford. When you start spending too much time away from each other, it’s only a matter of time before one of you starts asking the big question, “Do I need my partner in my life anymore?”

Don’t drift away so far that both of you don’t need to be with each other anymore. Find ways to indulge in exciting hobbies or spend evenings going out on little coffee or ice cream dates. They make for great conversations and it’ll bring both of you closer too.

#9 Space and individual growth. Now this is contradictory to the earlier problem in relationships. But it’s still something to watch out for. Too much of a good thing can turn out to be bad too. When you’re in a relationship, spending time with each other is very important. But at the same time, spending time away from each other is crucial too.

By spending too much time together, you’d subconsciously feel isolated from the rest of the world. And when that happens, you’d crave for any attention from other interesting people just to feel better about yourself and your ability to communicate. And you know what could happen when that happens, right?  

#10 Are you still in love? This is the biggest problem in a relationship, and one that’s hardest to overcome. Falling in love is easy. Staying in love isn’t. Love is a delicate balance between dependency and passion. How much do you need your partner? How much do you love and want your partner? [Read: Real signs that reveal if you’re not in love anymore]

When the sexual excitement and the enthusiasm fade away, what do you have to hold both of you together? A relationship should never be based on sex alone. It needs compatibility and understanding, and it definitely needs dependability. Staying in love forever is not easy, but with a little effort, it can give meaning to your life. 

Problems in a relationship can come and go. But if you ever come face to face with these 10 big problems in romance, don’t overlook it. It could cost you the relationship itself.

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Dalili za mwanamke anayekupenda, ila hawezi kukuambia

Kumekuwa na imani potofu kwa wanawake kwamba hawawezi kumwambia ukweli mwanaume anampenda kwanza mpaka mwanaume aanze lakini ukweli usiopingika ni kwamba wao pia hupendi na mara nyingi wao wakianza kupenda hupenda kweli kufikia stage hata ya kuhisi kuumwa. Hizi ni dalili za mwanamke anaekupenda ila anagoma kukwambia tu.

1. KUKUTEGA ILIKUJUA THAMANI YAKE KWAKO

Hufanya mambo ambayo yatamfanya kuona kama unampenda na kumthamini au la mfano wa mambo hayo ni kama kujifanya anaumwa na kauangalia respond yako kwake ni kiasi gani unamjali na kiasi gani utahangaika kwa ajili yake.

2.HUWA ANAPENDA KUKUGUSA SEHEMU YAKO YA MWILI.

Haoni aibu kugusa sehemu ya mwili wako. Msichana anayependa haoni aibu kukushika mkono ama kukutomasa au hata kukumbatia.Kwa kufanya hivyo hujua kuwa kwa asilimia kubwa hisia za kushikana kwenu kutamrahishishia kazi ya kuwa na wewe.

3. KUPENDA KUCHEKA TENA MUDA MWINGINE KWA NGUVU

Kucheka kwa nguvu hata kwa kitu kisicho chekesha endapo wewe umezungumza. Mara nyingi ataonesha uso wa furaha hata kama si furaha ya kweli.

4. WIVU

Hujisikia wivu anapokuona na wasichana wengine. Ukiwa unachart nao na ukiwaita majina ya kimahaba. Hapendi na hupenda yale afanyiwe yeye tu hata kama sio mpenzi wako.

5.HUKUMBUKA MATUKIO MUHIMU YOTE KUHUSU WEWE

Anakumbuka siku zako muhimu. Hukumbuka kama vile siku yako ya kuzaliwa hatoweza kuisahau kufanya ipite bila kukutakia heri ya siku ya kuzaliwa kama sivyo ukifauli mtihani au chochote katika maisha yako atakuwa mbele kukupongeza.

6. HUPENDA KUANGALIANANA WEWE MUDA MWINGI

Eye contact hupendelea sana kukuangalia machon muda wote ambao mtakuwa mkizungumza pamoja akidhani kuwa utamuelewa ni kiasi gani anakupenda kupitia vile anavyokuangalia. Ila wengine huona aibu kuwatazama wavulana wanaowapenda hivyo huweka jicho la wizi na kukuvizia.

8. HUPENDA KUKAA NA WEWE MUDA MWINGI NA KUKUJUA ZAIDI

Hupenda kukaa muda mwingi na wewe. Hawezi kupoteza hata sekunde ukimuhitaji kwa mazungumzo. Anajisikia furaha kukaa na wewe muda mrefu bila kuchoka. Anaweza akaacha kila kitu anachokifanya ili ajumuike na wewe na akikaa na wewe hupendelea sana mwanzoni kukujua wewe zaidi na hukujengea mazingira ya wewe uwemuwazi ili umwambie mengi kuhusu wewe na pia akiwa na wewe atakuwa muwazi zaidi hadi mavazi aliyovaa hupenda sana kujua yako na kukuambia yake na hupenda kujua ni mavazi gani yeye akivaa anakuvutia zaidi na atajitahidi kuwa anavaa ya style hiyo kukufurahisha.

9.YUPO TAYARI KUANGAMIZA

Kama msichana anakupenda yupo tayari kusacrifice. Ni kitu ambacho hakuna mtu ambaye anaweza akafanya kwa mtu mwingine. Utamuona vipi huyo msichana alivyo kwako na kwa wengine. Yaani yupo tayari akose lakini wewe upate na kwa mwingine anaweza akamwambia hana alichoombwa lakini akakupa wewe kama pesa na vitu vingine.

10. HUPENDA KUTATUA  MIKWARUZANO YENU KWA AMANI

Mikwaruzano ikitokea katika urafiki wenu hayupo tayari kukupoteza kabla hajakwambia nakupenda.Kwa kuwa anakupenda endapo ikitokea mikwaruzano basi atafanya juu chini kuyaweka mambo sawa ili asikukose.

11. HUPENDA KUKUNUNULIA ZAWADI ZA MITEGO

Mwanamke anaekupenda hupenda kujua mengi sana kuhusu wewe na hapo inamsaiia kukununulia zawadi za mitego kama boxer , na mara nyingi hupenda rangi nyeupe, au kukununulia perfume , sabuni ya kuoge ya manukato,soksi, vest, bukta, saa,raba, t-shirt. Na kama mkitoka wote mkaenda shopping ataakutega kwa kukuonyesha vitu na wewe ukionekana umependa kitu hatonunua siku hiyo ila atanunua siku inayofuata na kukuletea kama suprise.

12. KUPENDA MLE WOTE

Mwanamke anaekupenda ili akujue zaidi hupendelea msosi mle sehemu mmoja na kama ikitokea mwanaume hawezi kuhama sehemu anayokula mwanamke yupo radhi kubadili na kumfuata mwanaume hatakama sehemu hiyo yeye haipendi na kama unakula kwako basi atakutega na kuja kupika kwako ili mle na atakuwa anapenda kununua vitu vya kupika ili tu akutekena uone upendo wake.

NB: Kuwa makini, sio kila mwanamke atakaye onesha dalili hizi anakupenda kwa dhati, wengine hutaka kukuweka mtu kati ili akugagadue mpunga wako tuuu a.k.a gold digger.

Uncle B wa JF

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They're attached again! Romanian husband forgives wife who ripped off his testicles when he failed to buy her flowers on International Women's Day

• Ionel Popa, 39, was rushed to hospital after his scrotum was torn open
• His wife Marinela Benea, 40, grabbed his testicles during a row at home
• He has now revealed he is making a recovery and chose to forgive his wife

They have been filmed laughing and joking together as they told their story to local television Kanal D during an evening show called WowBiz

A Romanian man whose wife ripped off his testicle when he did not get her flowers on International Women's Day says they are back together after he forgave her.

Ionel Popa, 39, from Vaslui County in the north east of the country, was rushed to hospital with his scrotum torn open after his wife Marinela Benea, 40, launched a vicious attack.

The mother-of-one grabbed hold of her husband's testicles and pulled violently during the argument.

But now they have been filmed laughing and joking together as they told their story to local television Kanal D during an evening show called WowBiz.

The wife Marinela Benea, 40, said: 'Ionel had been given a bottle of wine for a day's work instead of getting paid, and had arrived home drunk. When he gets drunk, he changes. 

'All night he made me keep the fire on because he was cold and I did it to avoid having an argument.

'In the morning I opened the curtains and told him to go out and do some work, or at least to help with the household chores, but he shouted that I'm not entitled to give him orders.

'I told him he was not any kind of man and I grabbed his testicles. It was not my fault that he pulled away, and that's when it happened. 

'I thought maybe that some ice would solve the problem, but he insisted on calling an ambulance. He was pretty annoyed.'

But she added: 'His face changed when he felt something rip, but he didn't scream, he didn't utter a sound at first.'

Popa was rushed to hospital with a ripped scrotum and one testicle but is now recovering well after an operation.

He said: 'I'm ok, we all make mistakes; the main thing is I forgive my wife.'

He even laughed about the situation as he described what happened, saying: 'I was supposed to get some flowers. I should have woken-up earlier.'

His wife stood beside him squeezed his hand gently, saying: 'Every marriage has its ups and downs.'

Dailymail

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Mgeni wa Mke wangu(Mwanaume), anahudumiwa na mke wangu zaidi yangu

Habari zenu wanajamvi,

Naombei msaada katika hili, rafiki yangu ameoa na ana watoto wawili chini ya miaka mitano,majuzi mkewe kamkaribisha mwanaume mwenye mtoto toka kijijini kwao Kwediboma,Handeni ili aje hapa Tanga mjini kwa ajili ya matibabu ya mwanawe.

Jamaa anaishi nyumba ya vyumba viwili na sebule na huyo mgeni wa mke wake amepewa chumba chake,jamaa kinachomuumiza kichwa ni mwenendo wa mkewe kumuandalia maji ya kuoga na kumuhandle huyo mgeni wa kiume kwa heshima kubwa bila yeye mumewe kutowahi kupata huduma hizo siku za nyuma.

Ameshamwambia mkewe kuwa hamhitaji mgeni huyo nyumbani kwake,ila mkewe amejitetetea kuwa jamaa hana mwenyeji mwingine hapa mjini.

Kesho ni siku ya jamaa(mgeni wa huyo mwanamke) kwenda kliniki Bombo hospitali kwa ajili ya upasuaji wa henia ya mwanawe,na hapo ndipo dereva la daladala anapopata shaka zaidi ya kukosa kumuona mkewe kwa kuwa atakuwa bize kumpelekea chakula jamaa na mwanaye hospitalini.

Dereva wa daladala amechanganyikiwa,anaomba ushauri wenu afanye nini? Yaani mpaka mishipa ya kichwa imemtoka na anaonekana kukosa amani kabisa.

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